If you want it bad enough, you can get it

I'm sorry, I wish I had pictures to show my defeat...nah I don't really.  I also have a lot to say about this race, so this is quite a length post.  An inside look to my racing mind that never stops.

Cross is my all time favorite discipline of bike racing.  I race road to excel at cross and gain strength, I race mountain to improve my technical skills and  I put it together to race cross.  This season has been an incridble breakthrough CX season for me, I have won not 1 race, but 2 and as of now I am leading the Seattle Cyclocross Series.  But when I finish a race and I am upset and I didn't have as much fun as I would have hoped, I get dissapointed.  I don't want to race at the same venue 2x in one series (okay maybe if it was Enumclaw twice I would), but this venue is BORING.  Where is the technical?  Where is the mud?  Where is the discipline that I fell in love with?  The sunny weather we have been having doesn't help. 

Another weekend of a double header, Saturday was up north in Ferndale for the Cascade Cross Series and what an amazing course.  It was awesome, thank you Ryan and the guys at Traitor Cycles for creating a very memorable cyclocross course I was able to hold off on going all out and took home the W for the USA (Cross Border Clash...bringing the Canadians down to America)!

Sunday was another ball game.  We raced at Steilacoom for the 2nd time this season, and I wasn't feeling it.  When I pre-rode the course I just had this feeling I wasn't going to have fun.  The course (although mostly uphill for the first half) felt fast.  Here we go again another fast painful cross course with no mud and a lot of sunshine.  I wasn't feeling it, and with my track record I was going to get 2nd place (so far this season it has been a 2nd, 1st, 2nd, 1st, and now....***gasp*** 2nd!).  I just had an inkling, I think that's where I went wrong, I didn't visualize myself crossing the finish line first.  Actually, I went wrong in many places throughout the 49  minutes of racing.

It started well, I was third going into the first turn, by the 3rd turn I was 2nd, and by the run up I was first.  Then I realized my bike wasn't functioning well (um what's new?) I couldn't get out of my big chain ring and my bike was making horrible rubbing noises, and my rear shifting, well that never works.  I basically fumbled around with my bike all race long, getting frustrated, trying to shift, just the usual when racing my crappy Felt CX bike.  I even was fumbling on my mounts (which where awesome the weekend before), my head wasn't in the race, it wasn't in the game of holding off second place.  When it came down to passing men, I just didn't have the urge I usually do, I wasn't my normal bossy self yelling "get out of the way" (Okay usually I am a lot nicer than that).  So when I needed to pass the men, I didn't have the motivation to do it and I let myself sit behind them for far too long.  I didn't have the mental capacity to push it when I needed to.  My head wasn't in the right place. 

I was able to hold off 2nd place for most of the race, until the last lap when she caught me and almost pulled away.  Chris was yelling at me to get her and I almost gave him the finger, I was THAT unmotivated.  But I found a little bit of extra drive in my legs and dug in to catch her on the 2nd climb.  On the decent my bike decided it didn't want to cooperate (How the heck do you spell that anyways?) anymore and my chain fell off to the outside of my cranks, I was only pedaling for goodness sakes.  So naturally I shift down to get the chain back on and it pops back onto my small chain ring.  Great now I am in a gear I do not want to be in and I can't get out of it.  After racing all race in my big chain ring I was used to what gear I needed to be in through each turn and now it was going to be a whole new agenda.  2 turns before the barriers I was able to take a better line and accelerate out of the turn faster than the girl who caught me, so I got back into first place, hit the barrier, mounted faster, and it came down to a sprint to the finish.  I put all the gears on in my rear cassette and when it came to shift into my big chain ring..well it wouldn't budge, so I ended up spinning my legs out like a crazy person to the finish line, only to get passed at the line (wait, there was no line so who knows where the finish was). 

Awesome.  She wanted it more than I did, and she deserved it for the work she put in.  I didn't have that internal drive I needed to pull off a win. 

This race really upset me and it reminded me what I like about cyclocross and why I fell in love with the sport.  I fell in love with the sport because it challenged me, not just physically, but mentally.  It challenged me to figure out the best line through tricky turns, to try to catch the person in front of me, I was challenged to learn how to ride through mud and how to dismount my bike quickly and scoop it up before a run up.  I was challenged to escape the person behind me and work on my own to push myself to my capacity, but these courses haven't done that.  Is it the course?  Is it the weather?  Is it a combo?  After Enumclaw I had a sh*t (excuse the language) eating grin on my face for days because I had such a good time, I could have rode that course all day long.  Steilacoom...not so much. 

This weekend is at Woodland Park and is the  MFG series final.  My mom and dad, and my dads friend are coming out to watch so I think I might actually try to perform well for them!  This is one of the best courses we have so I can't wait for the race!

The following weekend is my friend Beth's wedding and I will have to miss Sprinker Park for the 6th SCX race.  This REALLY bums me out because it means a possible loss of the series title.  I really wanted to win the series, but I am setting myself up for a 2nd place finish so I do not get disappointed.  I can only be happy that this season has shown me how strong I can be and how much I can accomplish when I set my mind to it.  I came in wanting to win races, and I have accomplished just that.  It's amazing how when you find something that suits you, how well you can excel at it.  I never thought in another lifetime that I would be where I am with my abilities today, so all I can do is smile because the work I have done has payed off.  And that work has been pleasurable, I enjoy it, and it's my hobby.

....And then it was November....

I haven't been super amazing at keeping up with my blogging this Fall, but I sort of do that on purpose.  In my experience, if you blog too much, no one wants to read your blog.  You must keep your readers on their toes, eager and ready for the next blog post.

And honestly, I don't want to bore you too much with my random mumblings and rants. 

Two weekends ago was my good friend Beth's Bachlorette party, and boy did we have a good time!  We attended a drag show (hillarious btw) and then we went dancing all over Seattle.  We rented a "luxary van" that drove us all over, it was the best thing we could have done!  8 girls dressed to impress piling out of this white 15 passenger van, it was too funny!  Thank you to our driver who took great care of us the entire night, you couldn't have made the night any better.



Bridesmaids!

The following day I went and cheered on my fellow racers at the MFG race at Marymoor.  It was a different view being a spectator that day, but I had a ton of fun. 



Chris running up the stairs at the MFG race at Marymoor

This weekend was a double header.  MFG hosted a race at Magnuson Park in Seattle on Saturday and SCX hosted a race in Enumclaw on Sunday.  So far this season I have finished 1 MFG race so that puts me...in the back of the pack!  Have  I mentioned I am leading the SCX series? 

I was stuck between a rock and a hard place on Saturday, deciding if I wanted to race hard or not.  Do I save it for Sunday or do I go all out.  Which series is more important for me?  What am I focusing on?  What do I want?  Crap!  One of the riders told me "check your ego out the door today" and she was right.  Thank you so much!  That's just what I needed to do.  I worked hard for the first 1.5 laps and then I just didn't know if I should keep that pace up, my rear wheel felt flat and I was honestly stuck on how hard to work, my mind wasn't in the race.  So I basically toodled around in the back, riding in circles. 

Sunday we finally had a REAL cyclocross race!  Rain, mud, a run up, barriers, turns, crowds, and beer gardens!  I had been hearing about this course for 2 weeks and I was SO excited to finally race at the new venue in Enumclaw.  I kept reading about some "grim reaper" run up, we haven't had a run up yet this year, I train for those damn run ups!  So needless to say, I was excited, I can excell at the run up and I know I can put some time into people on them. 

After pre-riding the course I knew I was going to have fun so it didn't matter where I placed because I would have a smile on my face the entire time.  At the start line I wasn't even nervous, I let it all go and couldn't wait to get some mud in my face. 

For the first time ever, I got the hole shot!  Then I was quickly passed by  Kristi and Natasha and I let myself sit third wheel...not blowing it up, and waiting for the run up.  My plan was to try and be the first person to the top of the run up so I wouldn't get stuck behind anyone going into the single track at the top.  My plan worked, and by the top of the run up I had a couple second lead on the next women.  Then the lead got bigger and bigger and bigger with every single lap and I finished 1 minute 15 seconds up from 2nd place.  I was smiling the entire time because I can't remember the last time I had that much fun in a CX race.  The course required a lot of fitness, strength, and skills.  It was such a great combo of everything cross related, AND it was nice to finally have a race that required some technical skills!  Lots of muddy off camber, an awesome muddy decent (no brakes needed), and an awesome leg cramping run up!  I'm still smiling from the weekend. 

After this race I have a pretty good lead in the series, but that doesn't mean things can't change!!!

Jess and I at the finish.  She finished 2nd! 

I finally made a headline in CX Magazine !!!

Thanks to Jess for finding this picture of me.  Also thanks to Ian's dad for capturing that precise moment in time

A local garage sale

Apparently I dug deep.....to find myself a 2nd place finish this weekend at Silverlake, I call it a good ass kicking through the sand and hills to FINALLY wake my legs up from a long sleepy cold morning. 

This face perfectly portrays my feelings for 45 minutes.  I really did just want to kick my bike and cry.  Unfortunately for me, I had to keep going since I am focusing on this series.  Luckily I did keep going because once my legs woke up, I crawled my way to 2nd place. 

To make (what felt like) a long race short, the start went like this:
Into the sand and I was body checked out of the line I thought I was going to be taking

The middle went like this:
Chain dropped a few times and I lost a few spots and seconds, can I quit?  Fumbled through the sand...many times, lost more seconds.  My legs felt like icicles, perhaps a longer warm up next time. 

The end went like this:
My legs woke up.  Maybe I can catch Kristi if I play it right through the sand and work hard on the up hills.  Okay I caught her.  Wow 2nd place is just hardly in front of me, maybe I can get her too.  Okay I caught her, now I just need to hold it off for this last half lap.  Oops sorry Mel, I nearly decapitated you with my foot as I clumsily tried to get through the sand.  Can this race be over, I am officially embarressed of my performance today. 

Sunday was one big CX lesson.  I am so embarressed and dissapointed with the way I rode yesterday, yikes.  Kristi said it best when she said she had to take advantage of my fumbling all over the place!!!!  Man...how embarressing!  What a terrible race.  It's dissapointing because having a bad race and finishing 2nd...wow that's not too bad.  I'm trying to not dwell on the past, and I am looking at every race as a learning experience.  Racing in such a tough category teaches me a lesson EVERY week, whether it's a lesson about cross or lesson for myself and how I respond to this type and level of racing.  I'm learning and figuring it out.  It's a slow crawl for me (maybe?) but it's happening, and I'm just happy to be improving with every year and every race. 

I have so much I need to work on that one season isn't long enough to satisfy the crave of cyclocross and desire to get better. 

I'm setting this goal for myself right now:
Save money, buy a new cyclocross bike next year, have no mechanicals, and have FUN. 

Sorry no pictures this week.  I am going to try to remember to bring my camera with me from now on, and then actually try to take pictures.  Next weekend I will be racing at Wooley Cross in Sedro Wooley on Saturday, but then Saturday night it's a bachlorette party for me for my dear friend GOPHER!!!!!  So no racing on Sunday for me, it would be a sloppy mess if I did.

A pleasant surprise

Gosh I LOVE cyclocross!  I know every Fall I say it over and over again about how much I love cyclocross, but I really do love it!  I love everything about cyclocross, and the season ends too soon!  I can't believe the season just started and I am already depressed about it ending.  Who am I?


Ryan's race.  This guy was funny.



I had such a great weekend of racing.  Remember how I was taking a rest week?  Well, they pay off.  Saturday I raced at the first race of the Cascade Cross Series put on by Ryan Rickerts.  He never disapoints with a cyclocross race.  The course had some serious variety, including; flats, up hills, downhills, a bark mountain, rocks, pavement, gravel, single track, dirt, logs, barriers, off camber sections.  It was a total blast.  Knowing I was racing on Sunday, which is a very important race to me, I held back, and raced around 70-80% effort.  If my legs started to feel a little pain, I backed off, if my breathing was too much, I backed off.  I just needed/wanted to open up my legs for Sunday's race.  I ended up winning, an awesome way to start the race weekend.

Sunday was another fabulous race at Fort Steilacoom Park in Lakewood put on by Seattle Cyclocross.  I hadn't ever raced here, so I was excited to check out the course.  I heard it was either really interesting, or really boring, it has been in the series for a very long time.

The race started out FAST, I was thinking to myself, holy smokes I can't pedal that hard or that fast, let alone try to keep that speed for an entire race.  I was setting myself up for a 4th place finish.  A lot of the time with the womens racing your placement tends to be set about 3 minutes after the start of the race.  A few turns and body checks later I found myself sitting in 3rd place hanging on for dear life.  The first time up the hill the women in 2nd place powered by the leader, and I followed closely behind.  By the top of the hill it was myself, Jess, and Natasha powering away from the field.  By the time we hit the section by the second set of barriers I was able to make it through a turn past Natasha, and from there I held onto first place for most of the race.  With about 2 laps to go I hear Jess behind me "Courtenay lets work together so she doesn't catch us" and I said "Yes Please!!"  The last lap I wouldn't have gotten through without Jess leading me up the hill for the final time, I was hanging on for dear life.  When we hit the technical turns I ended up chopping Jess on a turn (sorry!) but she was so nice, let me get through the turns and to the home stretch I went and ended up with my first Elite win! 



apparently I can REALLY clear the barriers

This is so exciting for me because I feel as if I am still learning about this whole cyclocross racing thing, how to race with tactics, how to power through turns, and when to attack and when to hold back, how to work together, etc.  It was so great to have the top 3 be so close to eachother, even had I finished 2nd or 3rd I would have still had an awesome time racing with Jess and Natasha, that is how a race should be!  We need eachother so we can all push eachother to become stronger. 

I still need to work on my mounting onto my bicycle, but maybe by next week I can just stop thinking about it and commit already!

Next weekend is a stop at Silverlake in Everett.  This course was an absolute blast, aside from all the sand, and all 5x my chain dropped.  

Have I ever mentioned how much I love cyclocross?

PS.  Thanks Debbie for the pictures!

You Win Some, You Lose Some

Cross season...YEAAA!

I had a bad race last weekend and I have been trying to recover from it ever since (it's now Wednesday), the first weekend of October is not the time to get tired...yikes what have I done to myself?!!  There have been a lot of stressors in my life in the past 3 weeks and my outlet to escape is exercise, but sometimes your body can't take it and a rest day is necessary.  I remembered that on Sunday.  The past year of racing has been me playing with my "training", seeing what works for me and what doesn't.  How far can I push my body before I can't push anymore? 

Lets start with a positive note, I had a great race for the Seattle series first race, I placed 2nd, in a pretty stacked tough field.  Whenever I enter a race I never expect any result, because every course is different, every day is different, and everyone feels different, it's important to never get set on any result.  For some reason the race promoters thought it would be a good idea to start us 30 seconds behind the 55+ men....we caught up to them in the first corner!  It was outrageous!  I was cut off so many times, I ended up T boning a guy because he decided to not turn his bike through a corner and rode directly into the tape...it caused me to tumble because I lost my balance after coming to a complete stop.  From there I chased the entire race...and kept chasing. 

After this race I realized I needed to really work on my mounts.  I never looked at a 2 or 3 second loss as that much, but when you add it up over 5 laps, that's nearly 15 seconds, and that's what I lost by!!!  So I have been working on my mounts to perfect them at speed!

Last weekend was MFG race #2, and after not having a rest day for over 2 weeks my body revolted and I pulled the plug after much debate in my head and DNFed.  I thought I could push myself to finish, but all of the sudden I couldn't pedal anymore, and any power I tried to push...just didn't exist.  I decided this would be an appropriate time for a rest week.  I took Monday and Tuesday completely off of exercise and spent today as a really easy day.  I hope the race this weekend goes better than last weekend!

Some great news aside from racing...I found another part time job!!!  Maybe by next year I will have enough money to buy myself a functioning cyclocross bike so I can actually fit in to the Elite field with a bike that shifts and responds, and maybe some wheels with bearings that aren't shot!

YAY to having money!